A promise to me

When I was 19 (more years ago that seems real) I fell in love with a stone at a jeweller's.  It was a lavender spinel, from Lebanon; I saved my pennies and bought it; but at the time I could only get it set as a solitaire due to financial constraints and the fact that the stone was an odd size.  I did have it set, and in a jaded, naive 19 year old mind, I swore that from then on I would buy all my own jewellery, because then I would not have to return it when the man I was in love with turned false ...

I was never really fond of the setting, and always said I would get it re done, but never did.

About 15 years ago, upon his return from Croatia, the Wolf gave me a small diamond ring, as a symbol of our friendship, and the promise of something more.

The Wolf more recently had promised to take the spinel, and have it re-made for me into a new ring, and a promise of our life together.  Obviously, that never happened.

When discussing what I would want, I said that it needed to suit me - slightly off centre, and a bit un-conventional, without being in your face about it.  I had a good idea of what I wanted, then.

After things went sour with the Wolf, I continued to wear both rings for a while, until a young man wise beyond his years reminded me that symbols have power, and if I were really going to move on, maybe I should put the rings away for a while.  I did, and my relationship with Sebastian began to evolve.

A few months ago, the time felt right to have the rings re-made.  I took them both to a local goldsmith, and we discussed what I wanted, and what he could do.  He hand carved a wax mold, which was destroyed in the making of my ring, so it is truly one of a kind, and I think it reflects me well.  Unbeknownst to me until I picked it up, the small side diamond is set in what is called a "gypsy" setting ... I love that.

 

So this new ring is my promise ring to myself ... to remind me of my vow to live up to my own expectations and not anyone else's, to not compromise who I am for my room-mate or friends, my family, or a partner.  To always be true to myself first, proud of who I am, and comfortable in my own skin.