Blockhead, and a lack of social graces

I think "the new guy" will be known as Blockhead.  Mamma C gave him that name Saturday night, and I think it is going to stick.

He is an incredibly intelligent man, a very successful business man ... and, me thinks, at least mildly socially retarded. He says himself that he is an introvert, but I think it goes beyond that.  I think he's socially retarded.

And I need to decide if I have the strength of self esteem to deal with that.  Because even knowing that his social skills are lacking, the things he does hurt my feelings; my brain doesn't want to take them personally, but my heart and gut proceed straight to hurt.

Thursday and Friday night things between Blockhead and I seemed to be going very well.  He was talkative and flirty; initiating conversations, etc.  Saturday i was bar tending for a Legion event; he came by.  He was in a bad mood when he got there due to some work stuff, but barely talked to me; and went back to the kitchen to help with some prep.  I knew he had to leave around 7 for a family commitment; around 7 I said something to someone about him and they replied "Oh, he already left".  Not even a goodbye.  I was hurt, and I said something to Mamma C; she is teaching Baby Bear to say goodbye to his friends when they leave somewhere - maybe she could teach blockhead the same thing?  That's when she christened him blockhead - it seems he does that all the time, and it annoys the *crap* out of her as well.  So it wasn't personal, just annoying.

He is away on a business trip again for a few days.  And of course, I am busy as well.  We'll see when/if we get together again.  If his brain works the way I suspect it does, I may just come right out and ask him if he is interested in seeing where this goes or not.  I think I can do it without causing any weirdness between us.  I'll gauge that, and decide.

One of the guys ...

** I started writing this a week or so ago ... what a difference a week makes **

Well, it seems like my last attempt at a relationship has once more turned into friendship, with me being "one of the guys".

Of course, the fact that I dealt with my disappointment by going trap shooting this morning may indicate that I am a lost cause ... in my defense, I came home after and baked.  And turning clay disks into dust is highly therapeutic.

Pappa C and I had a great conversation last night which raised many good points to ponder, including the feminizing of men, and the fact that I don't need to be less of a "dude", I just need to find a man who is more of a man than I am - or as the now Mamma C's dad said about her, she needed to find a man with bigger balls than her.

Pappa C also held up a mirror for me, with just the proper ratio of blunt reality to "here's a straw"*.  If I don't want to be one of the guys, I need to quit getting as defensive when they treat me like a girl.  Ouch.  That would be a case of the truth hurting.

* = "here's a straw" = suck it up, for those of you who haven't been playing along at home.

~~~~~~~~~

Update #1 - The fellow training me at the new job is one of those overly feminized men.  A complete drama queen.  I am developing a twitch.

Update #2 - Maybe I'm not one of the guys.  It seems the fellow that I have been developing a "possibility" with is just fairly shy around women, by his own admission.  We finally went out on a "real" date, and had a lovely time.  I need to come up with a bloggy handle for him, since he's (hopefully) going to become a recurring character in the story ...

I really need to learn patience.

Happy V day, and meet the C family.

Happy V day kittens.

My friend Mamma C gave me these shoes last night.  Closest I will get to a Valentine's gift, and I  have to say I am kind of in love with them at the moment.

As as I wrote this post, it occurred to me I have never introduced the C family, who you will likely be seeing more of.


So without further ado:


The C family over the last year or so have gone from being casual friends to being very close friends.

Mamma C is younger than me, but a true soul sister.  Sometimes it feels like we are one brain in two bodies.  I love hanging out with her.  We can talk about anything, and she indulges my quirks (and I hers) and doesn't take offense to the sometimes blunt or random things that come out of my mouth.

Pappa C is closer to my age, and while first appearance is that he is a rough and ready redneck, as you get to know him he has untold depths.  He is very perceptive, not afraid to call a spade a spade, and has the ability to confront me with truths I may not want to hear in a way that makes me truly stop and honestly consider them, know he is right, and know that he still loves me anyway.

Little C, aka Baby Bear, is their soon-to-be 2 year old son, who I just love to bits, and the feeling seems to be mutual.

The youngest member of the family is currently known as the Fetus.  She will need a new name in very early April, for reasons that should be fairly obvious.  I have been invited to attend her transition into the world at large, for which I feel very honoured.

Look forward to getting to know these folks better, and in the mean time, enjoy the rest of your night!

♥♥♥

Lent ...

Lent kinda snuck up on me this year.  It didn't process until I got an e-mail today about tomorrow's pancake lunch at work.

Even thought I am a seriously-out-of-practice Catholic, I do try to give something up for lent every year, more as an act of self control than an act of faith or penance.

So what do I give up this year?

One of my friends posted this on FaceBook today:

How about that?

How about for the next 40 days (not counting Sundays - silly rule) I gently correct myself and re-route my thoughts every time I think about the Wolf, or Sebastian, or some of the scary what ifs.  How about I put away the reminders, the mementos, just until Easter, and try to move forward.

I'll let you know how it goes.  Or if I wimp out, and just stop drinking coffee instead.