When I lay down to sleep at night I put on a mediation CD. I have had insomnia for many, many years, and I find that if I use a meditation CD it helps me stay asleep once I fall asleep. The one I have been using most often lately is a meditation by Sylvia Browne on Contacting your Spirit Guides, or Guardian Angels.
As an aside, saying the rosary also generally puts me straight to sleep, but that makes me feel mildly guilty. A priest once told me it was OK, that if I fall asleep saying the rosary my Guardian Angel finishes it for me. I think they must get tired of having to finish it for me every time, though.
Back to last night. In this particular meditation, (greatly simplified) after you are centered, grounded, and white lighted, you visualize walking through a meadow (which for me always smells like salt water, is bounded by hemlock trees, and implies "Cypress"?), until you come to a gazebo in the meadow, and then one of your spirit guides comes out of the gazebo to talk to you. Usually the spirit guide I get is this rather dashing, very huggy Greek fellow named David. Occasionally it is a very short, stocky, shy woman whose hair is always in front of her face, very "cousin It". I have yet to catch her name.
Last night it was the Wolf. He came out from the gazebo, wrapped me up in his arms, put his forehead down on top of my head, started to cry, and said he was sorry. The feeling I got was that he was sorry he was so confused, sorry that he was hurting me, and that he really does still love me, he just doesn't know how to deal with it. I was startled, but I tried, in my meditative state, to send him back all the feelings of love, understanding, patience and support that I have in me.
Its common to us as children to play among the characters of mind. It is how we learn to sort through our daily learning trials and worries. Most of us remember little of the actualities of our childhood correctly because it is a time of rapidly changing focus. The danger with playing in the realms of 'gods and daemons' is believing whatever they tell us. Its one thing to visit the 'land of memories' sourcing for insight as to why we react to this or that....but asking for an opinion can be entirely misleading. Our attempts at objectivity are always subverted by our unconscious subjectivity to our early training.
ReplyDelete