I thought PMS was a trip ...

I've actually never been subject to the moodiness that some people get with PMS... but pre-deployment and deployment syndrome?  Holy Hannah, ya might want to back up a step or six.

At least with PMS, usually only one partner in the relationship has it, and it only lasts for 3 or 4 days.  With (P)DS, both partners are affected, and it lasts for *months*! 


I bar tend part time at the local Royal Canadian Legion Branch.  There are 4 older members who come in every day and play enough Euchre to get them through 2 small drafts each.  They are all really, really nice, caring fellas, what I imagine a grandfather would be like (I never knew any of mine).  They all know where the Wolf is.

Last night, after the game ended, a couple of them stopped to speak to me about it on the way out.  3 left, and one was still finishing his beer.  We got talking in a bit more depth about A'stan, being alone, and drifted into the 14 Americans and 3 Helo's lost on Monday, Taliban tactics, and some of the realities I try not to dwell on.

He got choked up.  I had been having a relatively normal day up until then, but as soon as his voice started to shake, I got a little teary myself.

I am pretty good at holding it together, until someone asks if I am OK, or gets a bit emotional themselves, and then it is game over.  It is like by caring, they have given you permission to admit your emotions.

I have been better lately about not getting angry in innapropriate situations.  It has been months since I have chewed out an un-helpful waitress, or a rude store clerk.

But I think it is bubbling under the surface.  Hopefully I can keep working it out on the trail or in the gym, and not on any innocent by stander.