S formally severed all ties with me last night.
He feels my naming the truth was a betrayal of him; he was happy ignoring what we both knew to be true, and resents the fact I forced him to deal with it.
I am very disappointed in how he has reacted, hurt by a number of the things he said and accused me of ( what I 'really' meant by some of my replies when I tried to explain) and the first bubbles of anger are starting.
I don't know how much of it will show up here. Right now, more than anything, I feel totally defeated.
Red was here for the weekend and got to witness part of it. She messaged me this morning and said "Don't worry, things will get better", and the only reply I could think of was "Don't tempt fate".
So my goal today, is to get through it without messing anything else up.
aside to Karen @ Muttering ~ based on recent drama, this may or may not be a good week for me to play with the Trifecta Writing Challenge, given this week's topic ...
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
2 comments:
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B...If you were honest, If you were true to yourself, If you said what you did with love and genuine caring...then you did not mess anything up.
ReplyDeleteYou told the truth, you took the trouble and the risk not only to care but to show how you felt.
I suspect you will come through this just fine.
Again I'm sorry you're hurting. I know from my own experience when I am dealing with someone in the throes of their addiction...sometimes they just aren't willing to see or hear the truth and it does feel defeating. But just as often I have seen those same people come round and it is just as possible that S needed a good dose of the TRUTH.
I know you may have said some things you regret or wish you could take back...nobodies perfect. But as I have said before...I know you had his best interest at heart, that IS very much your nature. I know for myself that there were times I just didn't want to know the TRUTH it was easier to hide out in my fantasy world and not face the pain of reality.
Sooner or later he will have to face it...or things aren't going to go well for him.
Don't get too discouraged...I know that's easy for me to say but as I found in my own life..it is often the very DARKEST...just before the DAWN.
Look to the east B...wait for the Rising SUN, the DAWN...it's a coming!
Thom
PS-Again I'll understand if you don't want to post this
What Thom says is true. All of it.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that you took a risk, a big personal one from the sound of it, and the outcome was so obviously painful. I could write all kinds of things, but ultimately you sound very sad, and also angry so I'm sending cyberlove, for what it is worth.
I say write. Come play with us at Trifecta. Truth or fiction, you choose. Whether or not you do, I'm sending you (((((HUGS)))))
My last week was such a killer, I didn't write either challenge. But I'd be a fool not to write this one, right?!
Boys are hard flipping work. Seriously. Ugh. Dumb boys.